This past week my husband and I had to make the choice to say goodbye to one very precious and beloved animal. Interesting that one of my last blogs was about grief. Little did I know how quickly grief would come-a-knocking. My heart’s broken and a day has not gone by when my cheeks have not been stained with tears of sadness. The Lord and I have chatted a wee bit these past few days. Some of the events which took place before we said goodbye to our precious “Sugar” have also placed within me a healthy dose of fear. I won’t bore you with the details. I have no doubt as I travel this journey of fear you will hear more about it in upcoming blogs. For today my desire is to share with you another perspective.
I sat down this evening to write more on the subject of Heaven and Hell in my other blog. However, my heart is breaking as I’m coming to understand the heart of God more. God the creator of all we enjoy, creator of all things we hold near and dear, must have grieved terribly when Adam and Eve made the choice to eat of the fruit which God had asked them not to eat. God created a perfect world and placed two perfect human beings in the world with the hope they might enjoy a lifelong relationship together. No one, not even God, desires a relationship which is forced. God like me, like you, desires a relationship built on both parties desiring the others companionship. Adam and Eve were the first man and woman, pioneers if you will of relationships to come. God created a beautiful world, a garden. So much wrong has entered the world since it was created we cannot fathom the splendor and the beauty. We see but a mere reflection of what it was once. I’m reminded of God’s desire to bless us in beauty for our pure pleasure every time I watch the sun rise or bask in a sunset. I look at thorny, odd shaped cactus which produces the most beautiful delicate blooms and I am reminded.
Adam and Eve got to enjoy walking, literally walking in the garden with God. My heart yearns to know what that must’ve been like. They not only got to walk with God they got to talk with God; to hear him just as I would hear you, if you were in the room with me. They could enjoy meals with God, smiling and enjoying each other’s company. The things my heart yearns for they got to enjoy and experience. But, and this is a giant “BUT”, it wasn’t enough. They listened to another voice, a voice who didn’t want what was best for them. A voice who wanted to destroy and take away what God had designed.
How God’s heart must have grieved that day when he entered the garden and Adam and Eve were hiding from him. How his heart must have grieved to know the one thing he’d asked his children, his creation not to do, they had done. How his heart must have broken knowing their life from that day forward would be forever changed.
Because of the abuse in my past and other life experiences I often struggle to see the softer side of God; the tender side of compassion and mercy, of grace and forgiveness. I have struggled and still struggle at times to believe God wants only my best. I struggle especially when living life seems harsh and cruel. Today was an epiphany of sorts. As a result of the last couple weeks I’m beginning to grasp, in a deeper sense, the heart of God.
Last year God gave me a vision; a message to share. The message, “There will come a time when people will cry out and it will be too late.” There will come a time when people will experience great pain and no one will come. No one will come to relieve them of their distress because the time to choose will have passed. Sandra, I want you to tell them. God desires no one would spend life apart from him; now or in death.
In my fear of the future, in my sadness and grief today, came the thought, “Lord, I’d be okay if you returned to call your people home today”. I’m so tired of feeling this way. But … I remembered … loved ones, family members who do not accept that God created the world. They do not believe in Jesus Christ as God’s son. My grief grows deeper and my tears greater still, knowing they could die and discover too late the Bible to be the true Word of God. I weep knowing they could die in a moment and have full realization of Heaven and a Hell. I’ve said this before but it bears repeating. If my faith is in error I’ve really lost nothing. When I die life will simply cease to exist. However, and this is a big however, if my belief and faith is the true faith and there is life-after-death then those who choose to not explore the possibility lose everything. There will come a time rest assured when truth will win out, death happens to all. When that time comes I pray you will have explored the possibility. I believe with my whole heart if you explore the reality of God, if you seek truth with your whole heart you will say yes to Jesus.
Yes my friends my heart is breaking and my grief runs deep. But deeper still runs the love of God for me and for all of us. Not too long ago I began to realize I wasn’t concerned with the things that broke the heart of God. In fact, I might have even prayed, “Give me eyes to see the things that break your heart, Lord”. I chuckle as I write these words, thinking I’d like to take my prayer back. Reality, I will pray this prayer more often. For as painful as the last few days have been, it’s given me a deeper understanding of the heart of God.
I typically close with the words until next time. Today I close with a heartfelt request.
To my family, friends and readers of my blog, if you do not know God, if you do not believe Jesus died for you, please from the bottom of my broken heart, would you consider at least exploring the possibility. Exploring the possibility God is real; he loved you so much he made a way through his son Jesus Christ for an everlasting relationship. Would you please consider the possibility of eternity, a life after death? In life on earth we have good and evil. It will be the same in death. There will be good a.k.a. heaven and evil a.k.a. hell. God never forces anyone to come to him or to choose him. It must be your choice. There’s no option C and no multiple choice; it’s either God or Satan.
There will come a time….
Jeremiah 29:13. “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with your whole heart”.